A couple of days ago in statistics, my class had group presentations. One group’s presentation involved sampling from everyone in the class. They did a random sample, choosing about 10 students from 25 or so. Students who were picked had to provide their height, weight, milk intake per week, and hours of sleep per night. Lo and behold, I was picked.
I guess if this happened a year ago, I would have outright refused to tell my peers how much I weighed —that would have tormented me for weeks. Surprisingly, though, I wasn’t ashamed that day. I wasn’t even the least bit embarrassed to be the heaviest person of the sample. I think it’s because I’ve finally accepted my body for what it is. If not that, I’m proud that I weigh that much. Exactly a year ago, I weighed 50 pounds heavier than I weigh today. I’m proud of myself for holding my own for so long. I didn’t even expect myself to keep up my healthy habits after summer. I’m still working towards my goal. That’s a feat that I’m extremely proud of.
So yes, even though there were awkward moments when people stopped talking after they realized that I was picked, I’m not ashamed of anything.
things I wish I never worried about:
- my body
- Not body positivity: Shaming thin women.
- Not body positivity: Promoting curvy as the ideal body type or as "real" and "what men want".
- Not body positivity: Shaming a woman for wanting to lose weight.
- Not body positivity: Shaming a woman for losing weight.
- Not body positivity: Excluding men.
- Not body positivity: Shaming or excluding any body type under the sun.
Ahhh. I knew it was a bad idea to bake. I promised myself that I wouldn’t eat anything that I baked, but I did anyways. I made cheesecake cupcakes and snickerdoodles today, and I’ll be making nutella croissants with my friend tomorrow and curry pie with another friend the day after.
And if that’s not enough, there’s going to be senior picnic on Friday, which means food, food, and more food! Then after that, I might be sleeping over with a bunch of friends. And you know what that means. More food. Then after that, graduation’s coming up. And I specifically asked my dad to take my family out for prime rib. AND on Friday, I’ll be going down to LA to see relatives. Yup, that’s right. Food. (I still want to try really good korean food and milk tea tapioca.)
I already reached my goal for the end of this month, but I feel like these next two weeks will make me gain back like 5 pounds or something. I’ve been so good this month, and I hope that eating bad won’t ruin everything. Gahhh. =[
Honestly if I had the body I wanted I’d probably dress like a slut Im just saying
Day nine: What is your favourite food, healthy or unhealthy.
Oh, gosh. This will be a long list. [I’m sorry, I can’t name one. So it’ll be a list!]
- Apples with cinnamon and almond butter (Justin’s is the best, I swear)
- Bananas and almond/peanut butter on sprouted, whole wheat bread
- Baked salmon
- Hummus, egg, and avocado salad
- Greek yogurt with honey and berries
- Potatoes (baked potatoes, chips, fries, etc.)
- Cheese (I guess moderation is okay, but I mean bad food like cheesecake)
- Chocolate (`nuff said)
- Fried food
I think that’s all I can think of! I’m sure there’s a lot more though. But yeah, those unhealthy foods are usually trigger foods for me. =(